Voodoo Doll
It’s another long night, had coffee too late
and now I’m awake
with the force of my failures
there in the chair, wearing your face

Everywhere surfaces shining
window and mirror and spoon
reflecting my own accusations
till they’re crowding the room

and believe me I wish I were bigger
believe me, I wish I could say
I was strong enough not to hate you
but I just don’t seem to work that way
and I’d love to practice forgiveness; I wish I could let it begin
cause I know that I am the voodoo doll
that I’m sticking my own pins in

And I’m not pretending I’m free of fault
I feel the blame in my arms and my knees and the roots of my teeth
this ache is not anything anyone wants

but at least I gave you my heart
at least my mistakes were honest
at least I tried for a love that was more than a checklist of promises


and there’s layers and layers
the universe peeling like onionskin all possibilities
mobius strips of my feelings
turning inverting to alter realities
shakti and shiva destroy and create in a game of holy duality
which means love cannot be removed from the opposite quality


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